12 August, 2009
I recently celebrated another year of this life o'mine with many loved ones. A girlfriend of mine (whose birthday is the day after mine) and I decided to co-party it up this year by combining our celebrations. We thought it would be so much fun to just have one big soiree and call it another year.
So we began to investigate restaurants where we could have a nice intimate dinner with just immediate close friends, small enough where finalizing the bill wouldn't require a half hour. We wanted to have fun and go somewhere we hadn't previously been, and we soon landed upon a new French restaurant in West Hollywood, Bistro LQ, which I will be blogging about in the next day or so - stay tuned!! However, we struggled a bit with finding a central and fun place for drinks after dinner with our larger group of friends. Wanting to try somewhere new and not too "edgy" as we would normally frequent, we landed upon a recommendation by UrbanDaddy for a bar called Madame Royale. The write-up about this Hollywood newbie made it sound fresh and very French, in line with our French dinner and rounding out a nice theme for the evening. Plans, however, seldom work out the way you plan them.
UrbanDaddy's positive review of the Moulin Rouge-esque bar appealed to us because it was different and seemed to be a less than pretentious Hollywood bar whose Parisian atmosphere and (hopefully) strong drinks would make the birthday celebration one we would hardly forget (or remember, if the pours were done right). HOWEVER... I am here today to tell UrbanDaddy, my fellow bloggers, blog readers and friends that Madame Royale nearly ruined our birthday night of fun.
As is typically the case, our dinner party ran a bit later than we wanted. We invited a large group of friends to meet us at Madame Royale, the previous location to Goldfingers and Play on Yucca at Cahuenga, at 9pm. We knew that a 9pm invitation time would translate to closer to 9:30 or 10pm, which it did. As we were quickly trying to leave the restaurant and head to Hollywood, our phones began to ring. The few friends who arrived "early" at 9:30 were told that Madame Royale was not yet open for business. Mind you, it was a Saturday night in Hollywood. We rushed the couple miles into Hollywood, fearful that our friends were standing outside waiting for the women of the hour to arrive.
When we finally did arrive, close to 10pm, we exited the cab to find two large bouncers, equipped with stupid Secret Service earbuds, standing outside of the front door with a small velvet rope. My fellow birthday-er and myself don't frequent Hollywood clubs at all, but this bar was not on Cahuenga, Hollywood Blvd, or Sunset. We weren't intimidated by the velvet rope or the bouncers. We saw our few stranded guests outside waiting for us, and we immediately asked the bouncers A) what time the bar opens, to which they responded, "Sometime between 10 and 11," and B) where the manager was, who I had previously spoken to about making a reservation at Madame Royale. The bouncers' ambiguous and fuzzy answer about business hours was LESS than acceptable. What kind of bar, old or new, doesn't open by 10pm on a Saturday night in LA???? Here we were, anticipating a party of thirty people or more, all drinkers of alcohol, waiting for this stupid pretentious bar to open, but it was too busy trying to create a line of people outside to build buzz while it sat COMPLETELY EMPTY INSIDE.
It was our birthday, and we weren't having any of this kind of stupidity. I ::possibly:: used a couple choice words for the bouncers, and we immediately left, all 10 of us thus far, down the Cahuenga corridor where we found another bar that would take our green money and serve us some stiff drinks. Our French theme quickly turned into a Mexican theme, which was fine with us. Alcohol tastes just as strong in both countries.
So, UrbanDaddy, please take this review as a big fat FAIL on your part to find a place that wouldn't even bother SERVING the supposed "discriminating" patron like myself. Just because I live near Hollywood doesn't mean I'm going to play it's stupid games, especially when it comes to my birthday and my alcohol.
As for you, Madame Royale, you will last just about as long as a pretentious and presumptuous bar typical to the Hollywood scene. I give you less than a year before you start to financially fail, not because you don't have a fun and unique atmosphere, but because you won't let people enjoy it and spend their money on you.
Parlez vous FAIL?